Dad, Daddy, Pop, Papa, Pa, and Father. The Old Man. Many names, but the same job description.
The term ’fathering’ means to treat with protective care. It means being involved, behaving responsibly, being emotionally engaged, physically available, providing financial support, and having influence in child raising decisions.
When you think about your Father you think of traits such as honesty, patience, integrity, hard work, and perseverance. Traits that, perhaps, and hopefully, made you what you are today.
The fathers of the last generation were stoic, went out to work, clean shaven, and at the end of the day brought home the bacon. In short, they were the principle providers while their wives, like your Mother, were the traditional home-makers and child-rearers.
Often, long workdays and shift work set the stage for the absentee father.Be that as it may, if you think about your own Father, it seems he was always there, even if he wasn’t. That’s the memory.
Your Father’s role as a parent was a huge responsibility and if he was a free-caring person, a bit of a rolling stone, well that went out the window the day you were born.
Your Father spent all his life trying to set an example for his child, with commitment, with dedication, with kindness and love. He was in his own way loving and understanding, if a little nonjudgmental, and not always open to change.
He tried hard in his own way to being a teacher, friend and guide. But mostly he probably just made it up as he went along.
There is no blue-print to being a parent. No manual for being a Father. When you think of your Father, for how ever long he was in your life, perhaps the first thing that comes to mind is responsibility. Also change… fear… providing… guilt — that he didn’t spend as much time with you as he should have because, well, he was out working hard to bring home the bacon. And then, if he lived a relatively good age, by the time he had time to sit back and relax and enjoy life and your company you were off busy doing your own thing or being a parent yourself.
There is no hard-set rule for the Father child relationship. We are all different. All Fathers are different, bu most are good and loving and only ever wanted what was best for you, even if life and their own shortcoming got in the way.
Now you can tell your Father’s story and pay Tribute to him here and now on Friends Past. A Tribute that will endure for ever and ever.